Tuesday, June 28, 2005

It's never "HIS" fault.

Today morning, we went through a grueling “HR-module” training.
A knowledge transfer session done by our Delivery Manager, who had come down from USA.
His primary tasks, when in USA were to, “UNDERSTAND”; “GATHER” client requirements, then get back and “GUIDE” us in functional/technical system-design specs.
[This is how an IT-Project starts]
He was at the client place for over 6 months working HARD and now back to do what he’s best at. “UNDERSTAND” “GATHER” “GUIDE”.

He spoke……

--The critical importance of the data is critically important

--When I were there low level design were never there

--This record is for hiring means this is for hiring

--The client wants the authorization given gives us the authorization responsibility

--Do remember to remind me about the other module [leaning forward towards a colleague]…………Remember

--Select this field and this field and put this there till this with that gives the result WOkey


[Punctuations have been conveniently avoided, to be on the safer side. I wasn't sure if he was asking, telling or threatening us]

Not able to keep up with his erudite disclosure, I stopped with these lines and went back to my dream “private island and nude women”.
zzzzzzzzzzzzz....

Typing this post, I wondered. Will I make it to the Delivery Manager post some day?
Someday maybe I maybe a someday manager

2 comments:

silverine said...

Wow he is great. We too have 'gems' like these. My PM told me to guide the designer to make "oval round" and a "rectangle square" icon for the UI. Erudition is the key to becoming a manager I guess.

Anonymous said...

Drop on by and browse through a huge archive of your mom joke

This is one of the many jokes i found amongst the many joke categorys:
A man walks into his favorite bar and saw a bum panhandeling. The bum asked if the man could spare a dollar. The man replied "If I give you money are you going to use it to buy liquor?" The bum said he would not, so the man asked "If I give you money are you going to use it for gambling?" Again the bum said he would not, so the man asked "Would you come home with me so I can show my wife what happenes to someone who doesnt gamble or drink?"